To repost from the original thread waaay back from the old CBG site: Someone begins a tale, and the next poster continues it. Two rules: A poster can't do two in a row, and try to have fun!
Feldorn lit a torch, motioning for his companions to follow. The tall, black-haired man held the flaming embers in his left hand while placing his right upon the hilt of his finely-crafted and bejeweled blade. Taking in stride the whiff of mouldy dungeon wall and the sensation of cold blasts of air jetting across his rugged features, the barrel-chested man paused when he spotted...
The pink bunny of Doom! Therin darted forward then, muttering a quick apology, shoving the small animal back into his rather infamous bag of tricks. While distracted however, he was unable to see the...
tarantula, roughly the size of a grown halfling's head and bristling with razor-sharp spines, slowly crawl from behind him. The arachnid scuttled forward, rearing its fangs to bite Therin, as Feldorn...
stepped on it. However, Feldorn's boots did little to protect his feet from the spider's spines, forcing him to leap backwards, straight into the arms of a...
rather boorish ogre, which is a considerable amount considering the average for the species. Doused in the scent of spoiled leather, the ogre cocked his head to the side, a crooked grin suggesting wicked thoughts. With a throaty laugh, the creature began to speak...
"I am Grack! And why are you attempting to step on Mr. Fuzzy's?" He then heaves Feldorn into the air, straight at/into...
Therein. As the large, barrel-chested man bowled over the wiry red-robed and red-haired mage, Grack approached menacingly, club in hand.
"Mr. Fuzzy's no like you. He says you die now..."
My feeble attempt to get this going again. I would like to see where this goes.
Grack raises his club fully prepared to make Feldorn into jelly, but...
he faltered when he felt the distinct sensation of an iron dagger lodged within his spinal cord. With a half-hearted gurgle, Grack plopped to his knees, revealing, behind him...
...a shlooping sound, as a glowing portal closes quickly, leaving behind a few green feathers and a...
faint odour of cheese. Limburger, in fact. Only the finest cheese was good enough for...
Gulveck, a strange short little man, sitting at a small table preparing what appears to be a freshly plucked...
...roofrat, a common pigeon.
"Greetings all. Sorry, I missed lunch. I come on urgent business..."
the princess has been kidnapped! or ran away! or got bored or something. Either way, she's gone and only...
a conspicuosly located group of heavily armed criminals... er... adventurers like yourselves can save her from the...
clutches of the nefarious Bihlori Lhi, possibly the worst person in the World."
So saying, Gulveck began putting quince chutney on the raw pigeon and...
garnishing it with limburger cheese. Feldorn looks at the disgusting lunch the stranger lays out before him and then turns to help Therein back to his feet. As Therein brushes himself off, Feldorn asks...
"Did we buy tickets for this train?"
And Therein replied...
"If we did, I want my money back." Therein sees Gulveck take a bite of his limburger and raw pigeon, and almost unsuccessfully holds back his breakfast. Gulvck breaks the silence while chewing his lunch, "So are you in or out?" Feldorn and Therein look at each other for a moment and then...
"In..., " they repllied simultaneously, both trying not to watch the liitle creature eat.
"Tell us more about this Bihlori Lhi," said Therein...
Gulveck waits to finish chewing his lunch before speaking once more.
"Well, I tells ya, she's the most annoying female I have ever, in my life, met. And i've talked to a red dragon queen before." He snaps his pudgy fingers, as if he had remembered something. "Jealous as a dragon, too. Of everything and everyone."
"So...is she a dragon?" Feldorn asks.
"Oh, gods no," Gulveck replies, as he rummages in his pack for...
... a longsword.
"She used to be my girlfriend, but... we had a... disagreement over who would rule the..."
"...Linburger sheep farms. They're essential for the top secret process of, well. I really shouldn't tell you this, but..."
"... creating biological spellweapons. Especially Welsh Sheep. They're the essential component in my favourite type, the..."
"...giant demonic chocobo blaster. Very useful in a pinch. Anyway, she'd like to have this secret and I need this princess so that I can..."
"...get the other half of this scroll, which is said to be a mystical incantation for wielding ultimate power. It is held by the royal family's youngest and most virginal member, naturally."
Little did he realize that it was actually...
... really just a copy of 'Hello!' magazine that had been read by...
a visiting warlock, unwary of the ways of this land. The foreigner, known as Dul, thought it was a spellbook, and the magic that was unleashed that day has been wreaking havoc on the area ever since, terrorizing the people with silicone and mysterious flashes. However, Gulveck had learned little of this, and thought of it merely as a recipe book for chocolate fudge pie - albeit a magically potent variety of pie.
"We better get going," Gulveck said, packing up his stuff. "Last I heard, the princess was being held in the prison of Lhi's fortress. Haven't been there myself, but I hear it's somewhere in the area of...
"... the elemental plane of puppies. Randomly spawning puppies just generically appear out of midair... it's quite worrying, actually." He goes red. "I... brought this one back... he's just... so cute..." He pulls out a displacer beast puppy from his bag. "His name is..."
I might as well give this thread one last try before it dies...
[spoiler=More Story]"...Ssa Dab IV. I'll have to get rid of it eventually...but I just can't bring myself to do it. Any of you want him?" Gulveck offered.[/spoiler]
"No!", Therein and Feldorn respond, shaking their heads in unison. "We should really get going. ", Therein adds after a brief moment of silence. Gulveck offers to transport the duo in his...
...furry airship of DOOM! "Really, it's not as dangerous as it sounds, although a little prone too...
... apocolyptic bursts of flaming debris. But that only happens every now and then." Therein and Feldom decline and decide to...
...use their magic rings to fuse into Fell-in, the half gnome, half man, all attitude conglomorate!
The twinned voice of Fell-in spoke haltingly, saying...
"WwEe SsHhO.." they are cut off when a female elf falls on top of them after the magic that combines them dissipates. "Where am I? ,"asked the female elf, named...
Thuravin. But the gnome-man did not know her name, as it(he) was lying trapped underneath her muscular bulk. "IiFf YyOoUu'Dd GgEeTt OoFfFf MmEe...II CcOoUuLlDd TtEeLlLl YyOoUu," Fell-in said. "By the gods!" the elven bodybuilder was startled, and somersaulted backwards. "I am Thuravin, of the village of Whey," she addressed the still prone gnome-man, "where have your infernal magics brought me?"
Fell-In looked at the bulky lady- as if "lady" could describe such a daintiless elf. "MmYy MmAaGgIiCc? WwHhAaTt DdOo YyOoUu MmEeAaNn? II TtHhOoUuGgHhTt YyOoUu CcAaMmEe AaCcOoRrDdIiNnGg TtOo YyOoUuRr....
(edit- didn't realize there was a second page >.<)
sDragon if you want to continue this one I will post so you can continue.
The elf cuts him off there saying...