Teleleli. Or, The City Never Dies; It Just Smells That Way.

[LD]

>>. Originally I was going to have adventure hooks marked as such, but this doesn't work with presenting it as a traveller's account. Any ideas on what I could do?

You could do it this way

"things things things.

RUMOURS/ADVENTURES

* And then one time I saw this: ADVENTURE HOOK.

* Another rumor I heard was that people one time did this : ADVENTURE HOOK."

It's a little clunky, but it could serve to address the concern Steerpike raised.

[Age of Fable]

Good idea, thanks.

[SDragon]

This is very much in detail, which I like. Unfortunately, I came up with enough thoughts to give a somewhat decent review just by reading the tech section.

First off, while it's something I typically try to avoid in my own work, I really like the narrative style and direct comparisons to the real world. It suits this setting well, somehow. Your use of puns is nice, too. This really made me laugh!

Catapults as transportation? This I'd really love to see! I can only imagine the experience for the travelers...

You had quite a bit of interesting stuff on swords. Are multi-toothed swords more expensive than those with only one type of tooth? Would those legendary vampire/dragon/etc. swords have a second set of teeth on them, as a backup?

I do like the glass/ceramic approach, too. One thing to consider is that, while both sharp, neither of these materials are strong enough on their own to make lasting weapons. Are these one-time jab-n-shatter weapons, or do they have some structural reinforcement to help them last? Historical glass/ceramic/obsidian swords were closer in design to your tooth swords.


Final thoughts: Raggedy Androids... heh...

[Age of Fable]

Thanks again. I've clarified the section on swords based on your feedback.

[Age of Fable]

Last call for any feedback!

[LD]

Not directly related, but AoF please note that I sent you a private message a few weeks ago that logs for me as still unread.

Re: "Library of Am-Kesh" classification system at the bottom of your page... points 3 and 4 are interesting.

[Age of Fable]

Oops. Thanks for that, I hadn't noticed it. I replied just then.