need advice....please

[NeazurLich]

i dont think or know if this is the place for this but i REALLYneed advice.

my freinds either dont know, or i cant talk to them about it.

There is this girl in my adventuring party, and she's really nice, beautifull, great person, good at D&D, we have alot of the same interests and all that and i think im falling for her. It makes things kind of awkward for me when we play, not to mention she lives a street up fro me, probably about 100-150 yards.

I really dont know what to do, she's already in a relationship but she told me she's thinking to end it soon since the guy moved to california.I have almost NO experience in this, my freinds either dont know too much about these things, or would probably spred word about it, (those ppl are more of aquantences) im 13 and have only had feelings for one other person and that turned out HORRIBLY.

Please help, i think its affecting my gaming and even my DM'ing, i accidentally ansered a question to the plot as Andrea and even said "A horde of andrea's i mean kobolds flood out into the room". If this isnt the place for it just tell me i'll erase it if i can, im just not sure where else to turn :(

[Ninja D!]

Truly, this would belong in the Tavern.  I'm not going to push that issue, though.  

The best thing you can do is relax.  If you're a nice guy, you're the one that will get the girl in the end.  In the end, mind you.  Right now and all through high school, being the nice guy means you are FUCKED.

If she's playing D&D, odds are she isn't bad, though.  Relax.  Be confident.  But NEVER try too hard.  That will only make things worse.  If things are meant to be, they will be.  We don't always get what we want.  It sucks, but it's true.

I probably haven't said anything that will help you.  It's all true though.  It's what I have learned from experience and I think that is the only way to really learn this kind of thing.

Good luck, you're going to need it.

[Johnny Wraith]

Black Jack Davey makes too many good points and that's probably very discouraging for you. Sad thing is... no matter how much advice you recieve, you'll end up making mistakes (Which is good, you're only 13 anyway).

Trying to relax as much as you can is probably the best way to go... Don't give the matter much attention, don't think about it that much... The most important thing you need to know is that she isn't the one, she is not the love of your life (And she won't be as much as you may want to think she is), she is just a chick... Who cares if you don't get with her? There are I think 3 or 4 chicks for every guy in the world... Chances are, you'll get lucky one way or another, lol (Oh yeah, condoms, safe sex, all that shit).

BJD (Lol, BJ :P <--- That was so Beavis & Butthead like) probably said it better. Just feel lucky that you know a chick who plays D&D (In fact, I would even advice you not to date her so you don't lose a player afterwards :P)

Here's your new motto: "I don't give a shit" <--- It works.

[Ninja D!]

I'm sorry that this sounds bad.  I know that no matter what advice you get, it won't make a difference.  You will think that your situation is special and unique and I really wish it were...but it never is.

[CYMRO]

Heed the advice of a man barely old enough to be your grandfather, take the chance.
Be polite, but definitely let her know that you would be interested in a more complicated relationship.  Proximity of domiciles is a major plus at your age.  So is common interests like D&D.
If she is enthusiastic, all the better for you.
If she is less than enthusiastic, make sure you do not react in any other way than continued friendliness and gaming fellowship.  Long lasting friendships are important too.

[Poseptune]

I agree with Cymro. Don't let your one horrible experience stop you. Trust me you will have plenty more.

[SDragon]

i dont think or know if this is the place for this but i REALLY need advice.

my freinds either dont know, or i cant talk to them about it.[/quote]There is this girl in my adventuring party, and she's really nice, beautifull, great person, good at D&D, we have alot of the same interests and all that and[/quote] i think im falling for her.[/quote] It makes things kind of awkward for me when we play, not to mention she lives a street up fro me, probably about 100-150 yards. [/quote]I really dont know what to do, she's already in a relationship but she told me she's thinking to end it soon since the guy moved to california.I have almost NO experience in this, my freinds either dont know too much about these things, or would probably spred word about it, (those ppl are more of aquantences) im 13 and have only had feelings for one other person and that turned out HORRIBLY. [/quote]Please help, i think its affecting my gaming and even my DM'ing, i accidentally ansered a question to the plot as Andrea and even said "A horde of andrea's i mean kobolds flood out into the room". If this isnt the place for it just tell me i'll erase it if i can, im just not sure where else to turn :(
[/quote]

again, relax. be cool and confident- itll help your DMing in these situations, and if youre lucky, itll help you with her.

also, remember, like HR said, theres probably about 3-4 girls for every guy. if things between you and her dont pan out quite the way you want them to, its not the end of the world, nor is it even the end of your relationship life.

best of luck :)

[Raelifin]

I suggest you try to break the ice... with your friends or family. At that age any relationship will be a little confusing and having people you feel comfortable talking with or asking for advice will be a big help, especially if it doesn't work out. And I do mean someone in real life. The internet is too much of a barrier to get decent advice over. :P

Wow. I think I just nullified myself! PARADOX! >_<

[SDragon]

I suggest you try to break the ice... with your friends or family. At that age any relationship will be a little confusing and having people you feel comfortable talking with or asking for advice will be a big help, especially if it doesn't work out. And I do mean someone in real life. The internet is too much of a barrier to get decent advice over. :P

Wow. I think I just nullified myself! PARADOX! >_<

that wouldve fit perfectly if you gave blatently terrible advice.....

[NeazurLich]

ok, thank you very much, i'll try to relax more, alot of it helped actualy, and i already kenew the nice guy thing lol.by falling for her i meant that im starting to kind of crush on her. thanks though i will try some of the said things :)

[Numinous]

I generaly agree with all advice above, even if it contradicts itself.  Because, paradoxes are fun!

Anyway, decide before you even talk to her whether the game or the relationship is more important.  Quite frankly girls(i.e. in a relationship w/ DM) and D&D games don't mix well.  I played with my gf once and it shredded my group terribly, possibly ruining my chances at playing D&D for the rest of my high-school career.

If you think it's worth it, go for it.  Just make sure you have your priorities straight first.

Oh, and don't ask her out until you're sure she likes you.  I've lost far too many friends that way...

[Ninja D!]

Good luck.