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Broken Verge: Nations of the North

Started by Superfluous Crow, November 28, 2009, 12:47:55 PM

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Superfluous Crow

So, finally some new material. There should be quite a lot of material here, which isn't that good when most people prefer short and concise. If anyone has ideas on how to cut off some details it would be nice; I could probably keep expanding on this one nation for quite a while even though it is little more than a city and some mountains. I have tried adding some appetizers by way of a "why you should read this"-list to keep you motivated.
But feel free to comment on this. I think this is rather well written - at least the two first parts. Hope you agree.    

Reasons to read: the Sovereign, the Flickering Angels, the Palace of Snow and Blood, Cult of the Weeping Maw,  the Wire and the Voltaic Fire.  


Kolyaev - the Old Capital
The Black Pearl of the North, The City of Statues, the Winter Gate, the Seat of the Sovereign

On the icy coast of the Sorkolis Bay, where the churning waves are stilled by both ice and sheltering peaks, lies the old harbor-city of Kolyaev. It was once the seat of a great empire, but has now become the last vestige of it; the center of the Remnant.  

Plagued by snow and frigid winds, the city has nevertheless always been an important trading hub as it is nestled between two seas: It rests on the verge of the Winter Channel - the small strait that connects the east and the west. This central location, along with its historical importance as the birthplace of the first Sovereign, was integral to it becoming the most important city of Northern Kherennem for 3 centuries.

The City
Fashioned from granite taken from the slopes of the Pale Mountains on which the city rests, Kolyaev is renowned for its steep, winding streets which navigate the cliffs and hills of the city.

Its architecture is grandiose and ornate and the city is dominated by massive plazas and tall towers,  testament to the wealth the city was once in possession of. But as the empire fell so did the city in a way, and many of the buildings are but hollow shells of what they once were, their magnificence being somewhat subdued by years of neglect. But the heritage of the city remains an everpresent part of the city, as the corroded copper eyes of past war heroes stare emptily at the passerbys and the crumbled remains of memorials to countless forgotten wars sit solemnly at the center of many plazas.      

Three edifices dominate the city: the palace, the bastion and the lighthouse. The Palace of Snow and Blood rests far up the in the foothills on the edge of a small cliffface overlooking much of the city, and is one of the greatest architectural accomplishments in the world. It was from this location that the north was once ruled unanimously, and it is still the domain of the Sovereign; the living embodiment of state and city. It remains a place of mystery even to this day; few but the members of the Praesidium and the Sovereign himself have even seen the inside of this snow-covered palace of red and white marble.

The Bastion is a far more crude structure; the oldest building of the city it is said. Fashioned from steel and layers of the most durable mountain rock, it was made to withstand any kind of punishment so it could forever stand vigil over the Winter Channel. It is thought to be impenetrable and is the headquarters of the imperial military. The fortress is also rumored to be the secret source of the voltaic fire which lights the streets of the city, but it remains but a rumor.

While the Bastion stands vigil over the Channel, the Lighthouse watches over the steam-shrouded harbor, its powerful flare sweeping the city and the sea with a changeless rhythm. A tall and imposing structure of white marble, this was the last work commisioned before the fall of the empire, and the completion of this project along with the fitting of the powerful voltaic light served as a symbol that Kolyaev would persist even if the empire didn't.      

The city serves as the end of the Forever Road which spans the continent, and ends appropriately in the Circle-at-the-End plaza; a massive open space circled by great oaken trees.

The Coiled Wire
There was little hope that Kolyaev would continue to prosper after the Empire fell. Many lost their belief in the virtues of the leader whose watchful eye they lived under and fled. But a second chance was soon to be granted to the Remnant nation as the scientist Ozmael Voltar discovered a thing that could change the world forever: electricity. Through esoteric and carefully hidden methods he released the searing, irradiant power of  voltaic energy and learnt how it could be controlled.

Now it flows freely through the great Wire that spans every single street of the city, showering the streets in a warming blue-white glow. Over the years the network has expanded until there hung above the streets a jumbled network of glowing copper and homemade wires, its lifeless tendrils penetrating into even the most common household as people found ways to leech away small fractions of the light and heat they saw suspended above their streets.    

The harbors also benefit from the bound flames as powerful voltaic heaters are lowered into the water until the steam boils up and the floating ice melts. The famous Kolyaevian icerenders employ the same technique to slowly carve their ways through the fields of ice that crowd the northern seas in winter.

The powers of the Coiled Wire is not without its price though. Only the enigmatic Keepers are allowed near the mighty receptacles which provide the near unlimited power the city feeds off, and few know the secrets of these strange machines and what their actual source is. And while one thing is the mystery of where the heat comes from, there are still stranger questions to ask about what comes from the heat. Mysterious human-like creatures have been sighted in the night; winged beings of electric luminescence which shy from the touch of man, and rest unseen in the wires during the day. The purpose and nature of these strange Flickering Angels, as they have been named by the populace, is still unknown.      

The Culture
Kolyaev culture is an intricate blend of northern tradition and imperial sophistication and patriotism.
They all live in the shadows of their glorious past, but approach this fact from various angles. Some embrace it; others, ashamed, reject their history and attempt to start from fresh. As the name implies, the Remnant is officially considered the remains of the empire and is more than just another outbreak state; they are a continuation rather than a fraction (although the size of their domain is quite a lot smaller).

The people of the Remnant take great pride in themselves and their kin, and children are met with high expectations and are expected to fulfill them to the best of their ability. Everybody has a place in society, and this is determined by the examinations made by the Guild of Censors who judge and measure every person in Kolyaev to the best of their ability.
Most come to terms with this rigid structure, but secret anarchic and anti-authoritorian societies are becoming common, their messages of dissent found fastened to rusting monuments in all corners of the city. There have even been violent riots, fought down by the military.      

Kolyaev has a well-trained and well-armed standing military, the members of which are hand-picked for strength and prowess by the Guild of Censors, and, although far smaller than it once was, the imperial army is still a feared military force in the north.

Foodwise nothing much grows in the north besides potatoes. Potatoes are thus a mainstay of their diet, with meat coming in a close second. The food usually somewhat drab by itself, spices from the south and herbs from the mountainsides are employed heavily, making their food unusually spicy. They are well-known for their spiced beef stews in particular.

Religiously the Kolyaevians prefer the larger and more prominent religions. The cults which emerged shortly after the fall of the empire never gained popularity. One cult remains though, but it is immensely old. The Cult of the Weeping Ravager is thought to be one of the remains of an ancient pagan faith once practised in the north, but in truth its origin has never been determined as it goes as far back as the Indeterminate Age by all accounts.

Its priestesses are chosen from the most beautiful young girls and they carve tears into their cheeks to bleed blood for the being they worship. The being itself is said to be a vast creature dwelling in the sea and below the earth, which drinks the tears of widows and children. The serpentine creature is seen as an idol of power, and is a patron of war to the people of Kolyaev. None but the priestesses worship the thing, but everyone respects and fears it. The priestesses make blood sacrifices by the waterfront; in most cases animal, although rumors claim they go beyond that. They are known for their haunting siren song which they sing on the peers of the harbor while they gaze out across the ocean in trance for hours on end. Military men are more respectful of them than others, and before major battles it is common to make a ritual sacrifice.  

The Sovereign and the Enumerated
The Remnant is built on the highest of imperial virtues: sacrifice and dedication. The Sovereign rules supreme, being the nation incarnate, but his title didn't come without a price. He is a nameless and friendless entity, forever completely dedicated to the state until his last remaining property - his life - also becomes forfeit after 15 years of service.

The Sovereign is picked by his predecessor, chosen from a group of Candidates found and rounded up by the Guild of Censors. Every Candidate enters the court at age 15 to live besides the Sovereign and his Enumerated, where he spends 5 years as a servant to the court undergoing training, indoctrination, and frequent punishment before the Sovereign picks his favorite. Only the strongest and most dedicated continue their training that long.

The Sovereign has to obey only the most common of ordinary laws, but in addition he must never speak his name, must keep his flesh hidden behind mask and silk, and must never have children nor family. The Sovereign can under dire circumstances be deposed by the Praesidium; his council of 77 Enumerated. This has only been attempted twice before, though, and has terrible consequences for those who propose the idea.  

The members of the Praesidium do not sacrifice quite as much as the Sovereign himself, but they live double lives and keep their identities secret while in the palace, hidden behind iron masks marked with a single number denoting their identity (this is the reason they are referred to as the Enumerated).

After 15 years the Sovereign steps back and completes the training of his successor before performing the ritual of Era's End in the center of the Circle-at-the-End which concludes with his demise at his own hands. The mortal shell is thus destroyed, while the identity of the Sovereign is passed on. The old Sovereign is from then on referred to by a title; a specific incarnation of the state during that period. Examples are the Conqueror, the One who Aided and the Ivory Spider.          
Although the Sovereign is commonly a man, there are no rules preventing Candidates and Sovereigns from being female.
Currently...
Writing: Broken Verge v. 207
Reading: the Black Sea: a History by Charles King
Watching: Farscape and Arrested Development

Ghostman

Very interesting. I got an impression of a hybrid between St. Petersburgh and Constantinople, with some industrial-age technology influences. I'm not quite sure how the geography works here. The city is supposed be on the slopes of mountains, yet it has a harbour?

Are the steamships actually powered by steam engines, or does the name refer to steam rising from the heated ice/water?
¡ɟlǝs ǝnɹʇ ǝɥʇ ´ʍopɐɥS ɯɐ I

Paragon * (Paragon Rules) * Savage Age (Wiki) * Argyrian Empire [spoiler=Mother 2]

* You meet the New Age Retro Hippie
* The New Age Retro Hippie lost his temper!
* The New Age Retro Hippie's offense went up by 1!
* Ness attacks!
SMAAAASH!!
* 87 HP of damage to the New Age Retro Hippie!
* The New Age Retro Hippie turned back to normal!
YOU WON!
* Ness gained 160 xp.
[/spoiler]

O Senhor Leetz

That's a great city. There an adventure PC game called Dreamfall, whose main city reminds me of this (this is a good thing. That city also had fantastic tavern names - the Salty Seaman and the Cock and Puss.) I really like the juxtaposition between a civilized, imperial city meshed with the more barbaric and wild elements commonly associated with the "North" - I think a Broken Verge version of Rasputin would be a great fit in this city. More BV?
Let's go teach these monkeys about evolution.
-Mark Wahlberg

Superfluous Crow

I'm trying to avoid steampunk to some degree, instead focusing on electricity and, later, the powers of the soul. So the steamships are just that; ships which make the water steam as they burn their way through the ice floes. Geography-wise, the city rests on a rocky slope which connects the sea-shore with the foothills. It's a pretty rugged place, so the city is build around and on top of cliffs. It's not exactly in the mountains. There are just close by, so it's not exactly flat ground.  
Hmm, a Rasputin? Perhaps... :p And I'm going to make a quick write-up of the Voltaic Receptacle and the Keepers, and something on a few materials and chemicals soon (Malglass, Phlogiston and ambrosia).
Currently...
Writing: Broken Verge v. 207
Reading: the Black Sea: a History by Charles King
Watching: Farscape and Arrested Development

O Senhor Leetz

very very much looking forward to new BV stuff. After reading about Kolyaev, I think I finally get the feel and "umph" of the setting - it's fantasy in the purest sense and doesn't build off of pre-existing troupes and archetypes.  
Let's go teach these monkeys about evolution.
-Mark Wahlberg

Superfluous Crow

Yes! that is indeed much of what I'm going for. To create something new, original, and hopefully interesting and to avoid the common tropes :)
Currently...
Writing: Broken Verge v. 207
Reading: the Black Sea: a History by Charles King
Watching: Farscape and Arrested Development

Superfluous Crow

Any verdict on the steamship name? I could call them breakers or something like that instead.
Any places you guys feel should be trimmed or expanded?
Something that you found odd or inconsistent?
Anything else?
Currently...
Writing: Broken Verge v. 207
Reading: the Black Sea: a History by Charles King
Watching: Farscape and Arrested Development

O Senhor Leetz

Quote from: Cataclysmic CrowAny verdict on the steamship name? I could call them breakers or something like that instead.
Any places you guys feel should be trimmed or expanded?
Something that you found odd or inconsistent?
Anything else?

anything else besides more BV? :) I would go with a different name for the ships, steamship has too much connotation with it, not to mention the fact that it is an actual type of ship. Way-Makers, or something to do with the word Melt? I dunno, but I have faith young grasshopper.

Are there any other cities from the Old Empire of Kolyaev? A religious city? science city? a dead, ruined haunted city? Any particular beasts/fauna/flora of the north? Giant musk-ox-like beasts of burden would be neat, or something like that.
Let's go teach these monkeys about evolution.
-Mark Wahlberg

Superfluous Crow

Most of the north was at some point under the rule of the Sovereign, excepting Khiere, the Whisperlands and Setch. Their closest neighbour is the Iron Union (name not completely decided upon as of yet) which was the old mining district of the empire. I might make a university city at some point, but that idea hasn't really grown to anything in my mind as of yet.
As to fauna... I'll have to think on that. But yes, most creatures that far north would be adapted to the climate with thick furs and such.

[spoiler=Ideas for ship names:]
Breakers
Icerenders
Tearcarvers
Seaknifes
Boilships
Thawhulks
Or any combination thereof?
[/spoiler]
Currently...
Writing: Broken Verge v. 207
Reading: the Black Sea: a History by Charles King
Watching: Farscape and Arrested Development

Superfluous Crow

Hmm, I'm not sure this is completely done, but it should be a good start. This country combines a lot of different references, and although it is not as "magical" as Kolyaev I think it came out nicely. Hope you like it anyway.

Why you should read: putrid rivers, the Metaltheurgy, Gray Rush, Hollow Cathedral, the chasms, air-baths and mock-bulls (and lots of mining and metal)

Solstheim - the Land of the River and the Mountains  
the (Ironbound) Union
Hidden in the snowy valleys of the Saltedge Mountains lie the many dirty mining towns that together constitute the Union. A cold, ugly, disorderly, and somewhat unimpressive country to many, Solstheim makes up for its many lackings by being an economical powerhouse with its thousands of tons of iron, precious metals, salt and mock-bull meat that is ferried down the river Umber that, to them, is almost as holy as the mountains themselves.

Lower Ferzest
Ferzest, The City of Black Snow, the Pitted City, City-by-Umber,
During the Gray Rush, many hopeful fortune hunters travelled to the dark and otherwise forboding peaks of the east in search of wealth only to find that the few measly wooden towns couldn't even hold half of them. They were left to find their own shelter, or flee their dreams to warmer lands.

Many decided to wait by the shores of the river Umber for a mountain miner to die so they could take his place, and they survived by taking coin from merchants for ferrying the ore downriver. Soon an industry grew up on the shores of the then-pure river, and the river became the second god of the mountain dwellers.

It's a city of filth, poverty, and greed, but also of thriving industry and faith. Fuelled by thousand furnaces the city keeps itself alive and prospers while it's rime-covered chimneys mark the snow with slag and soot, turning it black as it falls to the ground.
 
Rising above the low buildings of the commoners are the sturdy iron-clad towers of the union princes. The princes were once workers themselves, but as they rose to power they distanced themselves form their unclean past and colleagues and sequestered themselves in their hermetically sealed manors. There they enjoy the sweet smells of expensive perfume and the lavish joys of baths taken in alchemically purified air, only leaving their towers in rubber-clad palanquins.
 
Outside the towers, Ferzest is a of mess busy sweat shops, filthy marketplaces, and fuming factories. The icy, and soot-darkened streets are thronged with metalworkers, miners, and laborers of all kinds, and the desperate often journey to the City-by-Umber as there are always jobs and steady coin to be found, even if you'd accept neither if you had any other choice. Without a job and a furnace to warm yourself by, a man trapped in Ferzest is doomed to freeze to death in the streets; few there have the time or the money to help the unfortunate.
 
Lower Ferzest harbor a bustling place where wares in abundance are loaded on and off a plethora of barges and other river vessels, carrying merchants eager to barter for precious unionist steel. On the other side of the river lies Upper Ferzest, a barely inhabited disease-ridden slum even worse than its counterpart. Few Lower Ferzestians recognize it as part of the city. There are no bridges spanning the murky waters of the broad river.
 
A few shrines to Umber himself, the revered Slag Father, are found along the riverbank, and at night the river comes alight with the flames of dozens of floating pyres as the unionists send their dead into the arms of the Lord of Purification and All That Remains. 
 
The mountains and the river are worshipped more rigorously in the Hollow Cathedral in the center of Lower Ferzest. Constructed during the Gray Rush, it was fashioned piece by piece out of what little scrap metal the poor miners could afford. Its impressive but ramshackle iron girder structure supports the shell of a thousand rusty metal plates many of them inscribed with the names of the miners who bought them and fitted them to the church itself and it stands as a powerful monument to a will amongst the miners as strong as the iron they dig up from the earth. 
 
The Metaltheurgy
During the heights of the Gray Rush, miracles happened on a daily basis as poor turned rich with the swing of a pickaxe. It didn't take long before the first man claimed to be a prophet of the bountiful mountains and the metal the slept beneath them, and soon the mountains became more than just respected and treasured; they became worshipped. 
 
Two deities started to take form; the Motherload was the provider, whose treasures came from her womb - the earth and the mountains. The second was the river that flowed out from the mountains; he was called the Slag Father and became the great purifier who cleansed the land from the remains of both industry, mankind and death by taking their impurity on himself. The Motherload blesses prayers with wealth and fertility while the Slag Father grants peace, wisdom and atonement.
 
The Metaltheurgy is a prominent religion in Solstheim and is observed by many of the unionists. Shrines to the mountains and the river and small pigiron idols are found everywhere, and even the most poor of the miners from the most distant of mining towns attempt a pilgrimage to the Hollow Cathedral if they have the faith. 
 
The clergy are few, but even the Princes respect them. They serve as advisors, both on ethical and economical matters, and grant blessings and sanctify funerals. 
 
The Mountains and the River
Although Ferzest is what most consider to be "the Union", the real Solstheim is the mountains. The Saltedges are tall and slender peaks, throwing shadows across imposing vistas of dark-green pines and snow-covered rock. There is an eerieness to the mountains, a somber silence that follows you wherever you go, only broken on occasion by the howling of wolves in the distance and the sounds of the icy gales sweeping the valley floors. 
 
The mines are scattered across the mountain chain, east and west, north and south. All of the towns are small and nameless; they were built for a singular purpose, and never received a name beyond the number that the mine went by. Each mine is governed by a count who answers only to one of the princes. The counts often make their homes in castles or manors built above the small villages, so that they might watch over them. 
 
The villages are connected by a maze of small mountain paths which are traversed by caravans bringing goods to and from Ferzest, but not all of them are in good order and in winter the towns risk being sealed up for weeks - perhaps even months. 
 
The River, on the other hand, is not the center of the Union but rather the border. It snakes its way from a spring in the mountains, down a gentle slope, where it eventually empties into the Crucible; a large mountain lake to the south-east. 
 
The clean spring water once satiated the thirst of both Blacktawny and a multitude of small towns and villages along the riverbank, but in turn with the growth of Blacktawny the city became dark and murky with slag, chemicals, and ashes, and is now viscous, sluggish and only the poor and the mad dare drink from its rotten waters now. But even though the waters are dead, the river is always alive with the colorful bustle of merchants, travellers and the pyre-barges of the dead. The river never freezes over, even in the dead of winter when the winds and the snow come down from the mountains and cover the country in a white frigid blanket.
 
The corruption is diluted considerable by the time it empties out into the Crucible, but its influence is not unnoticable. Strange and deformed animals who have drunk from the lake have started appearing along the shores of the lake, and there are rumours of worse living at the bottom of the deep basin. 
 
The unionists do some minor farming on the slopes of the mountains, but they are mostly famed for their cattle; the mock-bulls. Created through alchemical breeding, these cow-creatures are unnaturally muscular and almost incapable of carrying their own weight. Their meat is known to be bland and frowned upon by high class chefs, but it's both plentiful and cheap which suits laborers and farmers nicely.
Currently...
Writing: Broken Verge v. 207
Reading: the Black Sea: a History by Charles King
Watching: Farscape and Arrested Development

LD

Glad to see this back. (See my signature for WHY I am glad to see it return! :))

The worship of Tawny's River and Mountain are perhaps the most striking part of that city.

The mock bulls are sort of hilarious. ... But a question here, why are the cattle muscular if they can hardly move? Did you mean they are very fat?

The mock bulls inspired me to read up on Kobe Beef: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kobe_beef (Did you base what you did on that sort of idea-- of course changing it significantly)?


--

Suggestion: I sometimes have difficulty reading your pieces because the paragraphs are not always separated. Could you please separate them?


LD

Re: Ship Names-
"Breakers
Icerenders"
Seem the best from a generic point of view.

For the electro-industrial feeling: "Seaknifes" seem suitable- so perhaps that is what you should go with?

Other Ideas: Steambreakers? Voltacruisers?

O Senhor Leetz

alright, more verge!

first off, this is good stuff. Not much I can really say - the writing is spot on, mechanics are fine (not that I really care about that) and the tone is good.

few critiques: reading about Kolyaev just made me feel cold, like something in the North should: I really didn't get that feeling of the battle with the elements with this. I would think mountaineers and miners would have even more problems with the weather than a civilized port city. Even adding some descriptions of rime-covered smokestacks, icy walkways, and drifting snow would go a long ways into trying it in with the north.  

this is just personal preference, as everything is, but there seemed to be TOO much pollution. It just seemed like an obscene amount of pollution coming from northern mountain mines, which I would imagine to be sparse and spread out. All and all, I got the impression that the nation of Solstheim and Tawny were bigger cities than Kolyaev was, which I presume is not correct?

also, do you have a world map for BV or the North? if not, I could definitely do one for you if you send me a basic layout
Let's go teach these monkeys about evolution.
-Mark Wahlberg

Superfluous Crow

Made some linebreaks here and there were it seemed appropriate. Did it help, or are there still problems?
The pollution is not so much from the mines but from Tawny. Tawny is filled to the brink with refineries and factories, each of them spilling their waste into the river (along with the not-too-hygienic public). It is a sort of exaggerated Ganges. Ofc, I'm not dismissing that in my efforts to describe how the river was horribly polluted I went too far.
And Solstheim is a bigger country than the Remnant. The union pretty much took the Empire's entire mining district in their rebellion (reminds me I should write up some of the history). Whether Tawny is bigger as a city... I'm not sure. It might be actually. Has had more chance to grow and expand. Kolyaev is practicising a more isolationist approach, conserving their strength. But I'm not sure which one would be the bigger... Thoughts?
And Tawny is a bit more temperate than Kolyaev, but you're right, it seems a bit too warm now perhaps. I'll look into it given time.
And I had a world map drawn up by Lath, but just like you I have a tendency to want to rewrite everything... But I generally like your maps quite a lot, especially the old style of it instead of it looking like satellite images :)
I'll PM you about it.
Currently...
Writing: Broken Verge v. 207
Reading: the Black Sea: a History by Charles King
Watching: Farscape and Arrested Development

LD

Perhaps it's a little better, but this is what I was talking about:

Quote from: NewThe River, on the other hand, is not the center of the Union but rather the border. It snakes its way from a spring in the mountains, down a gentle slope, where it eventually empties into the Crucible; a large mountain lake to the south-east.

The clean spring water once satiated the thirst of both Tawny and a multitude of small towns and villages along the riverbank, but in turn with the growth of Tawny the city became dark and murky with slag, chemicals, and ashes, and is now viscous, sluggish and completely incapable of sustaining life (Tawny now survives off collected rainwater and what meltwater comes from the mountains). Only the fanatics of the Slag Father dare drink from its rotten waters now.

The corruption is diluted considerable by the time it empties out into the Crucible, but its influence is not unnoticable. Strange and deformed animals who have drunk from the lake have started appearing along the shores of the lake, and there are rumours of worse living at the bottom of the deep basin.

It looks like you may have tabbed it in another word processing program, then imported it here... where BB does not recognize tabs.