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Golia

Started by Wix of Bel-Air, March 17, 2006, 03:51:47 PM

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Wix of Bel-Air

Jullana hit the ground hard. The minotaur had flung her over the rock and into the small depression in the forest. She tried to get up as fast as she could, her body aching from the blow. She looked up to see the ferocious beast silhouetted in the fading sunset. He had traveled far, she thought as she hadn't seen a minotaur around here yet. She had just completed her volunteer duty as a Sunfall Warrior and now she had yet to become a full member during her one month probationary period. If she'd live that long.
She sprang up to her feet and ran as fast as she could along the dried out river way. She could here the minotaur on her heels, clanking away in his underdark crafted armor. He raised his axe in the air and started to run faster. Although he was fast, he was carrying a lot of weight for a minotaur and Jallana was glad of this. Panting and still hurting, she ran around the tree bend into the small field where her survey was camped the night before. She ran across this field as fast as she could. She yelled in Elvish, "What dwarf would make an axe that big and give it to a minotaur!" as she continued running. She could here it closing up on her fast and she thought in the back of her mind,
please, don't let it end this way.
A large explosion behind her triggered her alertness as she jumped out of the way just in time. A large hole behind her with the minotaur on the other side had just been created with the magical fire now extinguishing. She could hear her survey run up behind her. One of her men, a cunning man who could shoot off a wand when it suited him, came up to her and said, "Are you alright, sir?"
The minotaur started backing up and then went into a full out sprint as he retreated. Jallana got up and yelled, "Do I look alright to you, soldier? And who in the hell gave you an order to shoot that thing at me?! You almost killed me, not to mention you just wasted some of the power that I was saving for -" she ranted as the private slowly backed away and from behind him came a smaller young man. She stopped talking to observe the man. He stood only five and quarter foot tall and he dressed in the orange robes that suited a courtier. He had a small book on his side and a few pouches that smelled of ginger and flowers. This man had a strange look in his eye and a certain mystery about him that Jallana wasn't too sure of. "What in the -" Jallana started.
" - Nine Hells is a pompous ass of my stature doing out her," he finished for her. She looked at him in astonishment and she was about to say something else when he interrupted saying, "I realize I caught you off guard, for which I'm truly sorry but my presence her is a short stay. I'm an envoy of the Second Division here to escort you back to the main encampment in the forest. I'll be taking command from here on out." Jallana was about to speak once more but he quickly interrupted with a small twinkle in his eye, "By authorization of House Mneogin, I have the rights and duties to take you and your men back home," he said with a small smirk, "is that alright with you, captain?"
Jahalla didn't like this but she knew she had no sway over this sort of man. "You'll address me as sir," she stated as she grabbed a washcloth from her shaken but diligent squire, "and when we get back to the camp," she turned to him, "you'd better, as by the emperor's shithouse, explain who the hell you are."
She walked off carrying her backpack in her arms and her troops behind her trying to apologize. The wizard smiled softly behind her and looked to where the minotaur ran off. "Traveled far indeed," the crafty house mage said to himself as he slowly walked off towards the encampment. He knew the minotaur had come all the way from the Halls of Gola, and he was sure as he was a shifty bastard, that he had friends.


Golia is an ancient cradle of civilization that has evolved from its prehistoric roots to the empire now in the present day. Although many of the lands are settled and civilized, spirits still inhabit the wild and untamed parts of these lands and the ancestors of citizens are in connection with their family. The Dragon-Crowned Emperor has set into state the seven realms and still retains the olden kingdoms to govern them although the Wizard Houses influence the policies and economics of the provinces.
Join rival political factions and empire-wide organizations to clash in secret battles to influence the system and claim the rights and resources you deserve. Travel in the wild and exotic locales that border the emperor's threshold and discover the local mysteries they hold. The intrigue of the Bandit Kingdoms and the hostility of the high seas are all for you to experience as you discover new isles with treasures abound. Join the wizard houses or become a daring outcast in the wastes of the Kacerno deserts.
With this campaign, all is possible and more. Enter Golia, the olden kingdoms and the new revolution of the empire.
Eats brains here! Ugh!
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.

[spoiler=Cthulhu]"To obtain a deep, restful, and fulfilling sleep, you must first submerge yourself in your cyclopean city of hideous non-Euclidean geometries beneath the sea, and then let your body die. But don't worry! As long as you continue to emanate enough evil thought-energy to influence and control your many worshippers throughout the untold eons, they will resurrect you when the time comes. I guarantee it!" [/spoiler]
[spoiler=Wash]
Yes. Yes, this is a fertile land, and we will thrive."

(as Stegosaurus) "We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'This Land'."

(as T-Rex) "I think we should call it...your grave!"

(Stegosaurus) "Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"

(T-Rex) "Ha ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh...now die!"
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Stanza 11]
No! penury, inertness and grimace,
In some strange sort, were the land's portion. "See
Or shut your eyes," said Nature peevishly,
"It nothing skills: I cannot help my case:
'Tis the Last Judgment's fire must cure this place,
Calcine its clods and set my prisoners free."
[/spoiler]

Wix of Bel-Air

General Outline for the Golia Campaign
(the (x) is for things I'm done)

Section 1: Intro
-General Idea and Conflicts
-Description of Realms and Regions
-Current State and Role-Playing Ideas

Section 2: Races
-Opptional Rules
-Tribes
-New Races and their Options

Section 3: Classes and Feats
-Barbarian Aspects and Feats
-Bard Songs and Regional Colleges Info
-Cleric Gods and Domains
-Druid Pets, Animals, and Living Fortresses
-Fighter Feats
-Monk Schools and Academy Monk Class
-Spirit Mystic Class
-Paladin Custom Armor
-Ranger's Living Traps
-Rogue Feats
-Sorcerer Tribe Bloodlines and Powers
-New Wizard Items
-Regional Feats (x)

Section 4: Prestige Classes
-All of the Prestige Classes
-NPC Prestige Classes
-Mancers

Section 5: Spirits and Deities
-Deity Portfolios and Family Trees
-Granted Domain Powers
-Spirit Servants and Template
-Terra Spirits and Templates

Section 6: Golia Campaign
-New Stuff
-Materials
-History
-Politics
-House Rules
-Planes

Section 7: Geography
-Towns and Cities
-Regions
-Regional Monster Glossary and Encounter Tables
-Realms
-Magical Places

Section 8: Creatures of Golia
-Monsters
-Organizational NPCs (x)
-Antediluvian Template (x)
-Fey Templates
-Elemental Templates

Section 9: Overlords and Wizard Houses
-Wizard Houses
-Empire
-Day-to-day stuff

Section 10: Magic Items and Treasures
-Region Specific Magic Items
-Region Specific Spells
-Druid and Ranger Spells
-Paladin Spells
-Sorcerer and Wizard Spells



Eats brains here! Ugh!
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.

[spoiler=Cthulhu]"To obtain a deep, restful, and fulfilling sleep, you must first submerge yourself in your cyclopean city of hideous non-Euclidean geometries beneath the sea, and then let your body die. But don't worry! As long as you continue to emanate enough evil thought-energy to influence and control your many worshippers throughout the untold eons, they will resurrect you when the time comes. I guarantee it!" [/spoiler]
[spoiler=Wash]
Yes. Yes, this is a fertile land, and we will thrive."

(as Stegosaurus) "We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'This Land'."

(as T-Rex) "I think we should call it...your grave!"

(Stegosaurus) "Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"

(T-Rex) "Ha ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh...now die!"
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Stanza 11]
No! penury, inertness and grimace,
In some strange sort, were the land's portion. "See
Or shut your eyes," said Nature peevishly,
"It nothing skills: I cannot help my case:
'Tis the Last Judgment's fire must cure this place,
Calcine its clods and set my prisoners free."
[/spoiler]

Raelifin

Aside from the numerous typo/spelling errors int he intro fiction, I find it hard to understand. I'd try to bring more exposition into the beginning. Why does the soldier call her "sir?" Why does she yell while sprinting (A feat that I know from experience is stupid and difficult)?

And of course I'll add the obligatory "This setting is too bland! Where's the innovation? Where's the pizazz?" After all, I wouldn't be Raelifin if I didn't lecture you on using elves, the underdark and er... um. I'm sure there's more."

Always critical,
   -Raelifin the PEACHy.

Wix of Bel-Air

Thx for the criticism yoz!

Anyway, as far as the typos, I'm pretty sure I used spellcheck on it although I didn't really consider a lot of great syntax in it. I don't really know what you mean by exposition, but please explain. As for calling her sir (if you read a little further) she is the probationary captain for a squad of Sunfall Warriors (to be explained later, basically defenders of the realm). She yells while running because the D&D rules says talking is a free action. Plus, she has PMS.

Do you really think it is bland? If so, can I have some... not ideas... but ways to keep the players wanting more?
Eats brains here! Ugh!
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.

[spoiler=Cthulhu]"To obtain a deep, restful, and fulfilling sleep, you must first submerge yourself in your cyclopean city of hideous non-Euclidean geometries beneath the sea, and then let your body die. But don't worry! As long as you continue to emanate enough evil thought-energy to influence and control your many worshippers throughout the untold eons, they will resurrect you when the time comes. I guarantee it!" [/spoiler]
[spoiler=Wash]
Yes. Yes, this is a fertile land, and we will thrive."

(as Stegosaurus) "We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'This Land'."

(as T-Rex) "I think we should call it...your grave!"

(Stegosaurus) "Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"

(T-Rex) "Ha ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh...now die!"
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Stanza 11]
No! penury, inertness and grimace,
In some strange sort, were the land's portion. "See
Or shut your eyes," said Nature peevishly,
"It nothing skills: I cannot help my case:
'Tis the Last Judgment's fire must cure this place,
Calcine its clods and set my prisoners free."
[/spoiler]

Raelifin

"She could here the minotaur..." (hear)
Ack, darn it! I can't find the other one!

In addition to the typoes, there are quite a few grammatical errors, and the text is a bit drab and confusing. Do you have an instant messenger? It would be a lot easier for me to talk with you about the fiction over it.

As for spice, I find all it takes is a single twist on every thing. That and getting rid of plagiarism in all of its various forms. (*cough*elves*cough*) Once again, it would be neat to talk in a bit more direct way.

Epic Meepo

I don't know about "bland," as per the previous poster's comments, but I would like to say that I'm not sure the story at the opening of your thread adds very much to my understanding of your world.  Tweak a few minor details here and there and it could be set in virtually any Core campaign world.  If you are going to open with a story, it should be one that goes right to the core of whatever it is that makes your setting unique.
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Unless noted otherwise, this post contains no Open Game Content.
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15 COPYRIGHT NOTICE
Open Game License v 1.0 Copyright 2000, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.

System Reference Document Copyright 2000-2003, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.; Authors Jonathan Tweet, Monte Cook, Skip Williams, Rich Baker, Andy Collins, David Noonan, Rich Redman, Bruce R. Cordell, based on original material by E. Gary Gygax and Dave Arneson.

Modern System Reference Doument Copyright 2002, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.; Authors Bill Slavicsek, Jeff Grubb, Rich Redman, Charles Ryan, based on material by Jonathan Tweet, Monte Cook, Richard Baker, Peter Adkison, Bruce R. Cordell, John Tynes, Andy Collins, and JD Walker.

Swords of Our Fathers Copyright 2003, The Game Mechanics.

Mutants & Masterminds Copyright 2002, Green Ronin Publishing.

Unearthed Arcana Copyright 2004, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.; Andy Collins, Jesse Decker, David Noonan, Rich Redman.

Epic Meepoââ,¬â,,¢s forum posts at www.thecbg.org Copyright 2006-2007, E.W. Morton.

Cebexia, Tapestry of the Gods Copyright 2006-2007, the Campaign Builder's Guild.[/spoiler]

Wix of Bel-Air

well now, that makes me feel great...

yeah, okay, I'm not an A+ class writer, but I did that in like 10 minutes, so I tried. And it wasn't supposed to give a HUGE amount of the campaign in any sort of deal. I was simply trying to illustrate the tension, diversity, and a general start to the campaign.

I couldn't write a story that summed up all or any one region in Golia... that's why it's special...

I didn't really give off the main idea of the Sunfall Warrior - in fact I wasn't really that close - I just had a thought in my head as to a situation they'd be in, in a common setting for that person.

In the meantime, I'd like to know what you want to know about. Anything. I'll write about in the best way that I can.

Ciao.
Eats brains here! Ugh!
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.

[spoiler=Cthulhu]"To obtain a deep, restful, and fulfilling sleep, you must first submerge yourself in your cyclopean city of hideous non-Euclidean geometries beneath the sea, and then let your body die. But don't worry! As long as you continue to emanate enough evil thought-energy to influence and control your many worshippers throughout the untold eons, they will resurrect you when the time comes. I guarantee it!" [/spoiler]
[spoiler=Wash]
Yes. Yes, this is a fertile land, and we will thrive."

(as Stegosaurus) "We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'This Land'."

(as T-Rex) "I think we should call it...your grave!"

(Stegosaurus) "Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"

(T-Rex) "Ha ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh...now die!"
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Stanza 11]
No! penury, inertness and grimace,
In some strange sort, were the land's portion. "See
Or shut your eyes," said Nature peevishly,
"It nothing skills: I cannot help my case:
'Tis the Last Judgment's fire must cure this place,
Calcine its clods and set my prisoners free."
[/spoiler]

Raelifin

Oh races! Definitely.

And I'm sorry if the fiction critiques were a bit of a tear-down. I'd like to apologize and talk about how to make it better over IM. You still haven't said whether you have a screen name. :)

Ishmayl-Retired

I don't know Raelfifin, quite frankly, I have no problem with other campaigns using core races.  I mean, if that's A - what the author wants, and B - what the campaign calls for, I've never really seen the need to criticize another creator on using those races.  I don't use them in mine; most of my races are originally created by yours truely, but that doesn't mean it bothers me when others use them.  I do agree that typically, there should be a little spice thrown onto them (Dark Sun's halflings and elves ring a refreshing bell), but then again, I don't think it's 100% necessary.  Making changes just for the sake of making changes tends to lead more towards gimmicks than substance, and therefore, in my oh-so-humble opinion, should be avoided rather than pursued.

Sorry for any spelling errors in this post; I'm on my laptop and I find it increasingly hard to actually type on one of these keyboards...
!turtle Ishmayl, Overlord of the CBG

- Proud Recipient of the Kishar Badge
- Proud Wearer of the \"Help Eldo Set up a Glossary\" Badge
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- Part of the WikiCrew, striving to make the CBG Wiki the best wiki in the WORLD

For finite types, like human beings, getting the mind around the concept of infinity is tough going.  Apparently, the same is true for cows.

Raelifin

Yeah, good point. I just find elves dull. But if other people like them, I guess they should go wild.

Still waiting for a "yay" or "nay" on the IM.
  -Raelifin

Ishmayl-Retired

I usually find them dull too, but sometimes people can make them interesting.
!turtle Ishmayl, Overlord of the CBG

- Proud Recipient of the Kishar Badge
- Proud Wearer of the \"Help Eldo Set up a Glossary\" Badge
- Proud Bearer of the Badge of the Jade Stage
- Part of the WikiCrew, striving to make the CBG Wiki the best wiki in the WORLD

For finite types, like human beings, getting the mind around the concept of infinity is tough going.  Apparently, the same is true for cows.

Wix of Bel-Air

Yeah, I have made different subraces (Pale Elves, Swamp Gnomes, and some other monster subraces) but I haven't really thought of doing anything with the races except for the idea of putting in a new race of people re-evolving back into their primal and powerful forms. It'd be a monster progression thing.
Eats brains here! Ugh!
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.

[spoiler=Cthulhu]"To obtain a deep, restful, and fulfilling sleep, you must first submerge yourself in your cyclopean city of hideous non-Euclidean geometries beneath the sea, and then let your body die. But don't worry! As long as you continue to emanate enough evil thought-energy to influence and control your many worshippers throughout the untold eons, they will resurrect you when the time comes. I guarantee it!" [/spoiler]
[spoiler=Wash]
Yes. Yes, this is a fertile land, and we will thrive."

(as Stegosaurus) "We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'This Land'."

(as T-Rex) "I think we should call it...your grave!"

(Stegosaurus) "Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"

(T-Rex) "Ha ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh...now die!"
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Stanza 11]
No! penury, inertness and grimace,
In some strange sort, were the land's portion. "See
Or shut your eyes," said Nature peevishly,
"It nothing skills: I cannot help my case:
'Tis the Last Judgment's fire must cure this place,
Calcine its clods and set my prisoners free."
[/spoiler]

Kalos Mer

Some people may write in telling you that subraces are the devil.  But don't listen to them.  Subraces, like many things in D&D, are perfectly fine in moderation.  Just don't create 15 different types of elves like FR, and you should be fine.

Swamp Gnomes?  You MUST tell me more...
My Setting:   

Wix of Bel-Air

Swamp Gnomes: A deranged sort of creature, the Swamp Gnome is a primitive and creative gnome offspring living in the water born cities in the Deep Everglades. They breeding the native lizards and snakes in the area to serve as food, clothing, and transportation. They retain the same sort of curiosity and innovative qualities of their cousins, yet they differ severly in their barbaric nature. They also closley relate themselves to nature, like their cousins, but they take this into a sadistic and strange field of study. The lack some restraints of other races but can make great creations of supreme utility. Traps made by these vile creatures are some of the most deadly in the realms. They are as strong and smart as creatures of their stature and make it their priority to survive in their harsh climate.
Eats brains here! Ugh!
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.

[spoiler=Cthulhu]"To obtain a deep, restful, and fulfilling sleep, you must first submerge yourself in your cyclopean city of hideous non-Euclidean geometries beneath the sea, and then let your body die. But don't worry! As long as you continue to emanate enough evil thought-energy to influence and control your many worshippers throughout the untold eons, they will resurrect you when the time comes. I guarantee it!" [/spoiler]
[spoiler=Wash]
Yes. Yes, this is a fertile land, and we will thrive."

(as Stegosaurus) "We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'This Land'."

(as T-Rex) "I think we should call it...your grave!"

(Stegosaurus) "Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"

(T-Rex) "Ha ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh...now die!"
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Stanza 11]
No! penury, inertness and grimace,
In some strange sort, were the land's portion. "See
Or shut your eyes," said Nature peevishly,
"It nothing skills: I cannot help my case:
'Tis the Last Judgment's fire must cure this place,
Calcine its clods and set my prisoners free."
[/spoiler]

Raelifin

Gah! You used the word "realms!" /me freaks out!
You're turning FR on us! Eeeeep!

Oh, I sent you a PM. I don't have MSN IM. :(

Back on topic: What's an Antediluvian Template?