The Campaign Builder's Guild

[ooc=...]I've learned from my first real setting, Ifpherion, that quotes aren't enough to really solidify the culture, environment or feelings of a region. So, i've been writing a few longer peices for upcoming worlds.

Any comments, criticisms and suggestions would be appreciated. I used to write a lot, but what with temping and saving up for school (in Technical Writing, no less...), i've gotten somewhat rusty at creative writing.


To start off with, i'd like to share a piece for my Setting-in-progress, Descension.[/ooc]






 The storm raged around Dava, the lead-filled rain trickling down her uniform. She sat in a high foxhole, waiting for her commanderâ,¬,,¢s word. Looking down, she could see other foxholes, manned by other Milonese troopers. They were as nervous as her, uncomfortable in the silence.
 This battle had been going on for a fortnight now. Ever since her squadron had arrived on Paradise Ridge, the enemy had been playing a game of intimidation. They had exclusively struck at night, and had presumably used anti-detection spells at all other times. When they did strike, the enemy made sure not to hit the heart. There were rumors going around the deployed units that the heart was key in the terrible rituals used to recover information from captured soldiers. Many of them, including Dava, had sworn to kill themselves before the enemy could get at them.
 She opened the frame hanging on her necklace, which contained a photograph of her family, taken in her home city. She could still recognize the visible landmarks â,¬' stately Paranesc Forum, the resplendent Towers, and the aging Flats, a honeycombed monolith where she had spent her childhood â,¬' through the holo-frameâ,¬,,¢s fading power and the dayâ,¬,,¢s leaden darkness. She could recognize her city, her home, anywhere. Dava hoped to return there some day.
 Suddenly, a loud THUMP could be felt, then another. She saw the eyes peeking out from the other positions opening wide in fear. Turning around, Dava saw what it was that had shocked her squad so much.
 Down past the escarpment, something was emerging from the forest that marked the enemy camp. It appeared to be a giant skeleton, more than 3 stories tall. It had all the features of the enemy â,¬' long leg bones, flickering tail and wickedly sharp claws â,¬' but the features were made even more diabolical, enhanced by the muddy sky. It had flickering balls of fire where its eyes should be, and it wielded in each hand assault cannons; of the same type the enemy used, but thirty times the size, and inscribed with undecipherable phrases.
 The giant skeleton continued itâ,¬,,¢s seemingly inexorable approach toward the escarpment, shaking the ground with each step. Sounds of gunfire punctuated the air every so often.
 A look over to the commanderâ,¬,,¢s position confirmed Davaâ,¬,,¢s feelings of terror; neither of them had been prepared for this.