The Campaign Builder's Guild

BTW This is not my world, my friends world, not mine, no.
He needs help IMO give him critism for construction...

Amvoria:

A bunch of gods created the world, Amvoria, by dividing the different jobs amongst them, one makes a species, another decides what climate goes where, ect. The gods agreed upon the most numerous race being human, because of their versatality and adaptability. The humans were so popular in fact that a few gods took the concept of the human and in their eyes improved on it creating elves and dwarves among others. The gods decided that their work was done and let their creations loose in their world. About 1000 years after the creation of Amvoria, the true desires of men have been unvield as the current ruler of a kingdom decided that he didn't have enough power so he ordered his court spellcasters and clerics to create a gauntlet that could grant him the powers of a god. He became an evil and despotic dominator, striking down anyone who defied him. He destroyed every dragon, and broke up the continent of Dracka in his rage. He could have destroyed all of Amvoria if it wre not for a group of great adventurers who slew him. The leader of the adventurers was awarded the kingdoms throne. He ordered that the gauntlet be locked up so that it could never be used again. He brought the world to a time of peace and prosperity, until he was mysteriouly killed by some unknown weapon in the year 1075.

1.  

QuoteThe gods agreed upon the most numerous race being human, because of their versatality and adaptability.

Then why bother with other races, which leads to the next point.

2.  Other races as merely variant humans is weak.  Why not just leave out other races?

3.  

Quotetrue desires of men have been unvield

The true desires of all men? This definitely needs clarification.

4.  

Quotethe current ruler of a kingdom decided that he didn't have enough power so he ordered his court spellcasters and clerics to create a gauntlet that could grant him the powers of a god.

Sounds depressingly familiar...

5.  

QuoteHe destroyed every dragon, and broke up the continent of Dracka in his rage.

He has his great desire.  What has he got to be pissed off about?  And...all the dragons?

6.  

QuoteHe could have destroyed all of Amvoria if it wre not for a group of great adventurers who slew him.

Were the gods on vacation at this time?

7.  

QuoteHe ordered that the gauntlet be locked up so that it could never be used again.

Again, did the gods and their followers take no interest in this?


Maybe your friend should rework his creation story to include a god who makes artifacts that emulate the powers of other gods, and have said deity randomly drop one here or there in the history of Amvoria.  Such artifacts could cause all manner of trouble among the followers of the god whose power/presence it causes a mortal to copy.  The over-amped ubervillain is just too Tolkeinoid and lacks logic.  

Ive been thinking about this world now im gonna put my own adaptation in:

Amvoria:

Jergawrash creates the world from nothingness, he then decides to make pitiful creatures to fight between themselves for his own amusement. He decides that the most numerous should be humans because of their inablility to stop hurting their own selves. Jergawrash made the other races to be like the humans so the lust for battle would be in them as well. Though the elves didn't have as much lust for battle as the powerful orcs did so Jergawrash cursed them to be small and frail. The elves turned their back on Jergawrash and created the arcane arts by mimicking the god. 1000 years later, Redular the king of Warsford the small southern kingdom of Amvoria, ordered his court spellcasters to create "The Gauntlet of Omnipotence" a device that he could use to destroy the evil god forever. Jergawrash saw Redular's machinations and decided to slay him, but not before Redular destroyed all of Jergawrashs' physical manifistations on the world: The dragons. Destroying the dragons though had its own consiquences as the continent of Dracka broke apart from the use of the gauntlet. Jergawrash put Redular II in charge of the kingdom of Warsford as he would continue to serve the war god in his constant amusment. Redular II was slain though in the year 1075 by Dwelz the Liberator, in an attempt to free the world from the tides of war.

Sorry about the crappy grammar but what do you think comparativly about both adaptations of this world?

Wow only one reply besides myself yammering. You guyes help sooo much [/sarcasm]

Patience, this is a slow moving forum.

And I am waiting for answers to the points I raised.  

K from what I can tell my friends thinking in this is:

1. I think he just likes the other races
2. Same
3. All people are evil, or something like that
5. Not sure, I just think he doesn't like dragons...or hes trying to make it unique
6. Proboblly, Mexico anyone?
7. Proboblly

But thats what I can get from it, my variant explained a few of these (eg. One evil god, lotsa races cuz hes a sadist who loves to watch people kill each other, King makes gauntlet to kill evil god first kills gods manifistation on world the dragons, god kills king, etc.)

I think it is an interesting civilization building myth/history...what I'd be curious about is where the players start out and what the actual campaign might be about. It sort of seems incomplete.

My friend said the campaign would be about getting the gauntlet before some evil guy did or something like that. The thing I don't like though is that he made it so that its an infinte Wish spell type thing and my point is that "Why would whoever has it even let us try? Wouldn't they just poof us out of reality?" but thats about it.

Is there any chance you could get your friend to join and post up his thoughts and opinions?  Reading this thread makes me feel as though I'm mediating between my best friend and his girlfriend as they squabble at the end of a long relationship.

Heres a neat idea. His history and your are the histroical teachings of two different orginizations (religions). Skipping the long version: they're both evil and after the gauntlet of power for themselves. Now it's a four team free for all. Ooooooh! Messy!

Taken that is such an awsome idea, made me giggle. MUAHAHAH,

Ill try and get my friend to join and post his stuff for himself now, not sure how his computer access situation is though.