Tel'Lagaia - Looking for input

[Wrose]

Hello everyone,
I'm brand new to CBG (just joined earlier today, was referred by the cartographer's guild).  I have been working on a home brew world on and off the past couple months and I'm really getting some steam up to finish and hopefully start a game set in it soon.  I'm hoping people here could take a look around my site and give me some input, good, bad etc...
Just some quick notes before you take a look though:
While I have a "real" story form story of creation and story of rebirth in the works I'm trying to avoid putting those on my site for players to read.  I have written the myth counterparts to those though.  I can't put my finger on it but both don't seem quite right to me.  If you have any ideas on how I could improve them while keeping both very MYTH format/style please let me know.
I've re-written the Harsieth race (and sub-races) like 6 times and I'm still not done re-writing them, lol.  After this latest re-write I feel I made them a little too froofy, thus unrealistic as a race.  As noted on my site that race is inspired by the Artathi written by FFG but mine version is based off a lot of research into egyptian mythology of cats, modern day cat traits etc.
Tel'Lagaia
Thank you guys all sooo very much for your time and input.

WRose

[Higgs Boson]

I must say,  great map! What program did you do it in?

[Wrose]

Hehe, thanks for the compliment.  I used some satellite images of earth and photoshop to create it.  It's nice for future additions to the world because of it's easy text layering.
The hardest part was giving it kind of a draconic skull look (mouth is at the bottom).  I don't know that I accomplished that feel sufficiently but my other tries didn't end up looking very continent like.

- Wrose

[Queenfange]

It's clear you've put a lot of work into the Harsieth. I really am not a big fan of feline races myself, but you've detailed them very nicely.

Are your deities all designed yet or just some of them? I couldn't find the list of them, but I may just get lost easily.

Your information on the dwarves' culture looks like it was taken directly from the PH. I think that's copyright violation; only SRD stuff may be freely posted. :/ What if anything makes the dwarves in your setting different? I'm curious how they fit in with the other races.

I like the seven silver cities.

All in all, looks good. Which sections do you plan on expanding on next?

[Wrose]

Queenfange,
Thanks for your input on what I have so far.  It was important to me that the Harsieth not come out as being furry like.  As they are feral and animalistic in their sentience and culture.
Although I have an idea of what I want to do for the deities, I have not yet gotten the deities other than Isi'us done yet.  The dwarves of my world I'm looking to be pretty much the gold dwarves from Forgotten Realms.  They are one of the oldest races on Doraen and managed to stave off the cultural influences of the Holy War from their culture but I know that for both the Dwarves and the Humans I need to go in and detail them a bit more.
Next I'm going to try and expand and bulk up the information on Shar'liell (give it as much information as I have for the Harsieth).  As I'm certain you can see I have skeletal write ups up for them right now and I am not happy with that.  I'm also concurrently working on some notes and write ups for the different cultures of humans that are found currently.
A quick synopsis of the humans: Those of Steil'ven are very much roman in influence.  Their national religion is known as Katu (an anagram of the first letter of each of the dragons) which is a religion that preaches everlasting influence of the dragons on Doraen despite the withdrawl.
Ter'rim is more greek in influence and their national religion will encompass a wide variety of Human ascended deities.
The Vedalum Waste Desert was just added on the map this morning, there I'm looking at placing a culture of nomadic humans, Bedowin like people.
Thanks for the heads up about the dwarves, I'll re-write it sometimes this week.
If you'd like I can keep you apprised of on-going major changes and additions.  Let me know.  :)

WRose

[Tybalt]

I like the legendary feel to your campaign. From the Isles of Ancestry to mysterious monasteries and hidden jungles there is a rather Hyborian sense of lost civilizations and ancient forgotten knowledge. Very evocative basic beginning. I will read more later but I must say that if I were a player I would be intrigued by that introduction.

[Wrose]

Tybalt, Thanks!  I am definitely going for a legendary feel so I'm glad I seem to be on the right track.  I look forward to hearing more thoughts when you read more of it later on.

WRose

[Zafuel]

I know I've only just registered, but I wanted to say something.

Get rid of the atpostrophe. It doesn't make a lot of sense 99% of the time, and it makes everything reek of the swarm of poor fantasy that came out in the aftermath of Tolkien.

Sorry, I'm not trying to insult you or your (very good) world, but atpostrophes in names can be quite annoying.

[Wrose]

Zafuel,
Thanks for that commentary.  Although I can see where your commentary comes from, my world specifically has a sizable amount of apostrophes in names due to the fact that they are the combination of concepts.  In the case of Tel'Lagaia, Tel=The Legacy and Lagaia = the world from which the creators came from.
Also, Harsieth have apostrophes in the racial names because of the fact that they represent the caste and their race.  For example, Li'Sieth represents Lion Harsieth.  Sorry, the removal is not something I can justify doing for this world.
But I do appreciate you pointing that out as I don't like apostrophes used in names for no good reason.  I only use it in fantasy writing when there is a flavor, concept and cultural basis for it.

WRose

[Ravenspath]

First off I have to say I love how your website works. The whole thing when you click on sidebar and it expands up to the main area is a very nice effect. And how it just adds to what you have already selected is a nice touch. How did you do all of that?

You mention in a previous reply that the apostrophe actually has meaning in the names. That is good. Is there a glossary of what they mean? So if I see Qi'Phori I can look that up and see what the full meaning would be?

The Creation Myth is just awesome. What happened to the new king and his mother? Very interested in learning that.

I will try to give you more feedback later. Can't wait to read more.

[Wrose]

Ravenspath: Thanks much, glad you like what you see so far.
As for the website.  I used  Tiddlywiki.
I don't actually have a glossary for all the names with apostrophes although now that you mention it my husband and I both think it's a good idea.  I might just do that.  :)  Qi'Phori = Energy of Grace (Energy ' Grace).
I am glad you like the creation myth.  I haven't really written too much up about the new king and his mother although I did have some ideas and concepts I might develop later on.
I look forward to hearing more from you.

WRose