Dilandri: Discussion

[Matt Larkin (author)]

You have an interesting emphasis on numbers.

...Thanks...I think.

Heh, it was intended as a compliment.  I meant that many real world cultures have concepts of sacred numbers.  In your case, that number is five.  You have five main gods, each of which (if I understand correctly) had five subservient gods.  And so forth.

[Stargate525]

You have an interesting emphasis on numbers.

...Thanks...I think.

Heh, it was intended as a compliment.  I meant that many real world cultures have concepts of sacred numbers.  In your case, that number is five.  You have five main gods, each of which (if I understand correctly) had five subservient gods.  And so forth.

Ah. sorry, you're first post kinda confused me. You're right about the God's thing, but there are NOT going to be 125 Gods subservient to the Children... I'm not thinking them all up at least. :)

[Raelifin]

I think I'll holdoff on the review until you've got a little more, but I figured I'd point out that ElDo or Ishy would no doubt be happy to move Korumaine's post if you PMed one of them.

[Stargate525]

I think I'll holdoff on the review until you've got a little more, but I figured I'd point out that ElDo or Ishy would no doubt be happy to move Korumaine's post if you PMed one of them.

I'm trudging as fast as I can damnit!  x. Seriously though, i look forward to seeing the review, it'll give me incentive to work faster.

I was actually about to do that. I did report it, but as you suggest, a PM might be better.

[Seraph]

It is fortunate that spend most of their time infighting with each other; acting as a single force, they would outnumber every other navy on Dilandri combined

This sentence confused me a bit and I would suggest it be re-written as:
"It comes as a blessing to the nations of Dilandri that they spend most of their time infighting, for if they were to act as a unified force they would outnumber all other navies on Dilandri combined."

Also, perhaps it would be a good thing to give reasoning why each races disagrees on the origins of the Sunken Hills.  Perhaps the orcs (seafarers as they are) have a culture that places heavy emphasis on the stars.  They worship the wonder of the stars and use them to guide their ships.  Having observed the paths of comets across the night sky and seeing how they seem to fall from their heavenly office, they cannot help but notices the masses of land they navigate between.

[Stargate525]

It is fortunate that spend most of their time infighting with each other; acting as a single force, they would outnumber every other navy on Dilandri combined

This sentence confused me a bit and I would suggest it be re-written as:
"It comes as a blessing to the nations of Dilandri that they spend most of their time infighting, for if they were to act as a unified force they would outnumber all other navies on Dilandri combined."

Also, perhaps it would be a good thing to give reasoning why each races disagrees on the origins of the Sunken Hills.  Perhaps the orcs (seafarers as they are) have a culture that places heavy emphasis on the stars.  They worship the wonder of the stars and use them to guide their ships.  Having observed the paths of comets across the night sky and seeing how they seem to fall from their heavenly office, they cannot help but notices the masses of land they navigate between.

I definitely like your sentence better. Consider it stolen, along with the star idea being abducted into the black hole that is my notes for review. :D

[limetom]

One good turns another, or so it goes.

You mention that tourism is a pretty big thing in Dilandri, but what about economic or political interaction?  With elves being like the Japanese, and gnomes being like a "race of Da Vinci's," I'd like to see what kind of economic and political interactions take place between the various regions.

Does one group hate the other?  Do some groups get along particularly well?  

Does one region have an abundance of a certain resource that it can export?  Does one region have a lack for said resource and must import it?  

You mentioned the elves are sort of isolationist.  Do they have everything they need?  Or do they import a lot of resources?  

I think these questions should help you flesh the regions out a little more.  furthermore, since I just skimmed it over, if the answers to some of these are in there, perhaps you should consider making them stand out a little more.

[Stargate525]

One good turns another, or so it goes.

You mention that tourism is a pretty big thing in Dilandri, but what about economic or political interaction?  With elves being like the Japanese, and gnomes being like a "race of Da Vinci's," I'd like to see what kind of economic and political interactions take place between the various regions.

Does one group hate the other?  Do some groups get along particularly well?  

Does one region have an abundance of a certain resource that it can export?  Does one region have a lack for said resource and must import it?  

You mentioned the elves are sort of isolationist.  Do they have everything they need?  Or do they import a lot of resources?  

I think these questions should help you flesh the regions out a little more.  furthermore, since I just skimmed it over, if the answers to some of these are in there, perhaps you should consider making them stand out a little more.

It think all those questions are answered at least partially in the Relatiosn thread of the specific race. You're right though, they do need to be highlighted and expanded. Guess it's time to add some more stuff.

[Tybalt]

I wanted to add that I do rather like your way of fitting magic into the context of your game. Many fantasy settings just sort of assume that 'there's magic' but I like the fact that it is part of the very existence of society and how the world works. I was thinking that the crystals are a good expression of that; you might want to expand upon insofar as how the particular races and viewpoints see them and their uses.

[Stargate525]

I wanted to add that I do rather like your way of fitting magic into the context of your game. Many fantasy settings just sort of assume that 'there's magic' but I like the fact that it is part of the very existence of society and how the world works. I was thinking that the crystals are a good expression of that; you might want to expand upon insofar as how the particular races and viewpoints see them and their uses.

Thanks. I'll keep that in mind for when I overhaul that section.


Since the weekend is approaching quickly, I can get some more of this setting done. I don't have anything really burning for me to write down, so I'm open to suggestions. What do you want to see more of by Monday?

[Stargate525]

I'm still working on this, I promise. In case any of you guys are watching....

[Matt Larkin (author)]

Oh, we're watching you...

[Xeviat]

As I promised, here's the start of my Dilandri Review

I have some questions about the Arcanist; their number of "arcs" aren't given on the table, like the description says it is. If I'm understanding this correctly, an Arcanist can access any spell in their spellbook, but they can only have a number readied at any one time (and they get a number equal to their level as mastered spells). So, if I'm still understanding, they're a mixture of spontaneous and preparatory; I like it.

I finished reading your races and gods, and I like them very much. I particularly like the uniqueness of their origins, how they are all tied to a single pantheon of deities. They all fit together very well. I also like that Orcs are sea farers; the other races seem fairly unique too, but they still feel the same. The fact that you seemed to have not needed to create new races as of yet makes your setting all the more approachable.

As for the deities, which your setting focuses on greatly, I'll try to comment on them individually:

First, The Five don't seem to have really defined portfolios of their own. Did you intend this? What do they do themselves? Do they just designate tasks to their children? And, for what reason is Lilnith LE instead of NE? Was that a typo?

I really like the origin of the gnomes and halflings, thus I like Quarren. Again, since I can't get a good feeling for the Five's portfolios, I'm not sure what else to say about them.

I guess I'd like to see the Children of Luminor updated more; I don't really have an impression of them. One question, though; if Luminor and Lilnith only had one child, where did the other children come from? Did they just come from themselves? Why is Lor evil (unless he does evil things with his servants that is)? The rivalry between Caed and Gudruun is quite amusing. Ganes made me laugh, and the thought of gnomes running around crying "Ni" did too (like Monte Python much?). I like the fact that your deities seem to have lives, even though they haven't been detailed to much. More detail on them would be appreciated, and I'll try to come up with some good questions on them specifically.

I will read and review more soon.

[Stargate525]

As I promised, here's the start of my Dilandri Review

You promised a review? I don't remember it, but thanks.

I have some questions about the Arcanist; their number of "arcs" aren't given on the table, like the description says it is. If I'm understanding this correctly, an Arcanist can access any spell in their spellbook, but they can only have a number readied at any one time (and they get a number equal to their level as mastered spells). So, if I'm still understanding, they're a mixture of spontaneous and preparatory; I like it.

First, the reason the arcs are missing is because the crunch of the magic section is still in flux. Once that's cemented, the arcs will be too.

And I originally saw them as essentially a sorceror with a spellbook, but I think I like your idea of having a prepared list of spells that can be casted spontaneously. I'll have to think on this.

I finished reading your races and gods, and I like them very much. I particularly like the uniqueness of their origins, how they are all tied to a single pantheon of deities. They all fit together very well. I also like that Orcs are sea farers; the other races seem fairly unique too, but they still feel the same. The fact that you seemed to have not needed to create new races as of yet makes your setting all the more approachable.

I'm assuming by 'feeling the same' you meant that they still feel like I pulled them straight out of the book. I was originally going to have five extra races, but early on I decided that I had enough races already to accomplish what I wanted to do with them, so they were dropped. The only one that I think I radically changed is the halflings; I'll try and get more on them up after my next update.

As for the deities, which your setting focuses on greatly, I'll try to comment on them individually:

First, The Five don't seem to have really defined portfolios of their own. Did you intend this? What do they do themselves? Do they just designate tasks to their children? And, for what reason is Lilnith LE instead of NE? Was that a typo?

Yes. That was a typo. I will fix. As for the actual five, I don't intend them to have too fleshed out of a portfolio, since they are not nearly as involved in the affairs of Dilandri than are the 25. You could say that they designate tasks to the five below them, but you could also say that the five below them are aspects of themselves personified. Another thing that I'll have to think on.

I really like the origin of the gnomes and halflings, thus I like Quarren. Again, since I can't get a good feeling for the Five's portfolios, I'm not sure what else to say about them.

I'm glad you liked the origin; that was a result of me thinking up an explanation spur of the moment as to why there are six races and only five main deities.

I guess I'd like to see the Children of Luminor updated more; I don't really have an impression of them. One question, though; if Luminor and Lilnith only had one child, where did the other children come from? Did they just come from themselves?

The child spoken of are the orcs. The 'children of the five' are deities. Either the gods' current partners aren't mentioned, or there was some kind of hanky panky going on with mortals, or they can simply create offspring. I haven't really decided yet.

You should keep in mind though, that the myths and legends in Dilandri are very much myths and legends. Stories of an event or the creation of a place can be completely different and even contradictory, depending on the race telling it.

Why is Lor evil (unless he does evil things with his servants that is)?

I think it was because that at the time I was planning on running the gods as a 'you are what you're worshiped as' kind of thing, and most societies consider death an evil. I've readjusted my outlook on that a bit, and am considering changing him to LN.

The rivalry between Caed and Gudruun is quite amusing. Ganes made me laugh, and the thought of gnomes running around crying "Ni" did too (like Monte Python much?).

Ni...? Crap, I completely forgot I left that in there. What can I say, a result of thinking up names and information at the wee hours of the morning.

I like the fact that your deities seem to have lives, even though they haven't been detailed to much. More detail on them would be appreciated, and I'll try to come up with some good questions on them specifically.

I await them with great anticipation.

I will read and review more soon.

I can't wait.

[Ravenspath]

Stargate,
I owe you a more a review for your help on Five Realms last weekend so here it is.

First off a non setting comment. I really like the way you have layed the setting out. The format is very easy to read and flows very well. I especially like your little notes about inspiration. It is a peak inside your thought processes on the building. I will admit I may steal the format for my worlds too.

The Races-while you have tied the races to their individual lands you have given excellent reasons for how and why they all interrelate which helps bring the world together. You mention in the human post that they recognize only political boundaries vs racial ones. Is there a reason for that? I also like how when you have changed the 'typical' view of a race you give an excellent reason of how this came about. The half-orcs as an example.

Your regions section again is excellent. You have given such little details as 'the second and third largest rivers' which draws the reader further into the world. I look forward to seeing more maps!

Religion-I have to say creating 30 gods is a massive undertaking. Hats off to you. I like the Five a lot. You are excellent at tying your ideas together. I like the gnome/halfling split from Quarren, but was wondering if there was a reason that Theomis hadn't created his own race by then since everyone else had. The lost child of Quarren is inspired. As a player I would want to find out anything I could to discover who that was. Your gods are well thought out and cover just about anything a person would want to worship.

I would like to see further expansion on the actual religions of the world. For some reason that part of a fantasy world completely fascinates me and with your complex set of pantheons I think the actual religious heirarchys would be amazing. I would also like to see a chart detailing the Five, their children and then lines connecting the gods to their respective opposed.

Crystals-This is such a nice way to get away from the material components aspect of arcane magic. It appears that you can grow any of the types of crystals that are listed. Are there special requirements or materials needed to grow a Ionir versus a Kuvu?

Governments-In the dwarven Dauken you mention a metal that can improve other metals. Did I miss this metal being named or explained?

Chronology-excellent work on describing the various moon phases and how those days are viewed by the populace. And how it impacts magic.

Dragonfest- so do both the dwarves and halflings celebrate this festival? And separately? The way I first read it it seemed that they took turns being in charge of it. By the end it is obvious that they each do celebrate it. I would be interested in knowing more of this story.

Myths and Legends- your side note says that you are going to play to your strengths and you do. Each one that is currently listed is in a different 'voice' that makes it very easy to believe that it was written by a different race. Excellent job. I can't wait to see what other Myth and legends you create.

Even though we both of a Five themed worlds you have used that idea much more pervasively throughout your world to its benefit. I look forward to reading more.